Andrew Sullivan, writing in New York Magazine, writes poor Donald Trump’s trigger word, “absurd,” is emblematic of his entire presidency.

President Donald Trump is absurd. His presidency is absurd. His party is absurd. We have known this ever since that absurd journey down an escalator, and the surrealism has only intensified since. Perhaps it takes a sane foreigner, not subject to years of almost hourly Trump abuse, to point out the obvious. We have no Executive branch in any meaningful or serious sense. We have a joke that’s wearing thinner by the day. There is no institution or company in America, small or large, that would allow Donald Trump to run or represent it for more than a few days — because most sane institutions see immediately that a rape-y racist with no knowledge base or capacity to learn is an embarrassment, and a huge liability. If appointed the head of, say, a local library on January 20, 2017, Trump would have been fired by January 21.

His economic policy is absurd. In a time of intense economic inequality, he has made the rich far richer, at the expense of the nation’s fiscal balance, during a long recovery. The deficit has exploded; tax cuts did not add any real growth; and an unpredictable trade war with everyone is weighing down the economy. His climate policy is absurd: denying that a crisis exists and encouraging more fossil fuel use. His immigration policy is absurd: the deployment of cruelty as a substitute for legislation even as illegal immigration surges past the peak of his predecessor. His foreign policy is absurd: enabling North Korea, trashing NATO, blowing up summits.

His physical appearance is absurd: the fake orange tan, with the white circles around the eyes, the massive, hair-sprayed and dyed pompadour. How many people in public life look anything like that? His endless lies and contradictions are absurd. And his psychological disorder — the narcissism that guards against any hint of his own absurdity — is getting obviously worse. And it was always going to get worse.

…

The only reasonable response to this president’s words is to burst out laughing at the absurdity of it all.

Well, no. The reasonable response to all of this is to impeach him or invoke the 25^th Amendment. Of course, neither of those two things are going to happen. So, the only thing left is to vote overwhelmingly for the Democrats in 2020 and beyond.

I was vaguely aware that WWE’s Vince McMahon and others were relaunching the XFL. Apparently, this “league” starts up in 2020 and they just announced the first eight teams in a borderline ridiculous video.

Barry Petchesky, writing in Deadspin, has the hottest take looking at the boringness and blandness of everything and then comparing it to the XFL first go around teams. It’s too bad they didn’t think to bring in some of the old names. Still, I actually kind of dig BattleHawks.

The best part is the copy introducing each team (read them here and here with choice highlighted areas). The copywriter had a good day that day.

By the way, whatever happened to the Alliance of American Football?

A person’s success in life can usually be measured by the number of uncomfortable conversations he or she is willing to have.

- Tim Ferriss

Who cares about the T-206 Wagner or the 1952 Topps Mantle? For my money, Keith Comstock has the greatest baseball card ever. Thirty years after his card’s release, Comstock told me the story. This was the funniest interview of my life. (via @ESPN) https://t.co/VPSz0dVVDy

— Robert Sanchez (@MileHighRobert) August 21, 2019

Ashley Fetters, writing in The Atlantic, talks about if it’s possible for men and women to be friends.

In 1989, When Harry Met Sally posed a question that other pop-cultural entities have been trying to answer ever since: Can straight men and women really be close friends without their partnership turning into something else? (According to The Office, no. According to Lost in Translation, yes. According to Friends … well, sometimes no and sometimes yes.) Screenwriters have been preoccupied with this question for a long time, and according to a new study published in the Journal of Relationships Research, the question is also likely to be on the minds of people whose romantic partners have best friends of the opposite sex.

Personally, I subscribe to the Friends answer. Three of my best friends in the world are girls. My wife, has no fear that I have romantic feelings for any of them.

Kate Wagner, writing in The New Republic, reminds us of Barack Obama’s iconic logo and then goes over the branding of the current Democrat candidates.

Personally, I’m partial to the Beto O’Rourke and Pete Buttigieg brands. Although, I think the Joe Biden campaign logo is pretty good too. I’m also rather partial to Kamala Harris’s approach with the “For the People” line.

Helen Rosner, writing in The New Yorker, has a strange story about fast food chicken sandwiches.

There are dozens of fast-food chains in America, débuting hundreds of new menu items each year. Of these, maybe two or three in a generation make significant inroads into our collective culinary consciousness: a McRib here, an Impossible Whopper there. Perhaps the stunt with Sweet Dixie Kitchen wasn’t even necessary: the Popeyes chicken sandwich has ascended to the pantheon in record time, not because of a catchy ad campaign or an irresistible pricing scheme but because it is, if Twitter, Instagram, and uncountable blog posts and off-the-cuff reviews are to be believed, the best goddam chicken sandwich in the world. 

I must confess… I don’t really like Popeye’s Chicken.

Michael Wade, writing on his site, asks a few questions regarding time.

Is time linear or circular, an hour-glass, or ocean waves? Can time be managed or should it be regarded as an investment? Once lost, can it ever be recovered? If it could, would we know where it went?

Is time a collection of actions and omissions, moves and dodges, diligence and neglect, where the assessment of winning and losing largely depends on where the deadline is drawn? [One coach noted that his team really didn’t lose the game, they just ran out of time.]

The only thing that is clear about time is the usual request is for more.

Leo Babauta, writing at his site Zen Habits, outlines why we should attempt to create structure in our lives. I agree with everything here and fail horribly at it.

I need to try again.

Seth Godin, writing on his site, has a few ideas about habits (but that isn’t anything new)

If you’re trying to help yourself (or those you serve), the most effective thing you can do is create long-term habits. They become unseen foundations of who we will become.

The goal of running a marathon in six weeks is audacious, but it’s not a habit. You might succeed, but with all that pressure, it’s more likely you’ll simply abandon the project.

On the other hand, the goal of running to the mailbox (at least) and back for 50 days in a row is the sort of habit that might stick.

The same goes for education (“we do flashcards every day” is very different from “I need to cram to learn quantum mechanics for the test.”)

And it goes double for our lifestyles. If you can replace a bad habit with a good one, you’ll live with the benefits for decades.

The challenge is to set up systems that are likely to create habits, not sprints that lead to failure.

Dana Blanton, writing on the Fox News website, reviews a new Fox News Poll showing Donald Trump is in a world of hurt come next November. He’s losing to every conceivably viable Democrat with registered voters.

>A Fox News poll released Thursday showed President Trump losing head-to-head matchups against four of the top Democratic presidential primary contenders. The poll found Trump with 39 percent support among registered voters in head-to-head matchups against Sens. Bernie Sanders (I-Vt.), Kamala Harris (D-Calif.), and Elizabeth Warren (D-Mass.). The poll found Sanders beating Trump with 48 percent, Warren winning over Trump with 45 percent and Harris winning with 46 percent support. Former Vice President Joe Biden, meanwhile, beat Trump in the theoretical matchup with 50 percent support among those surveyed, compared to Trump’s 38 percent.

The poll also breaks down voter concerns in a way that probably doesn’t surprise most people who have been following politics since the last election. Basically, people are worried about mass shootings and are exhausted by political battles that don’t accomplish anything.

Remember, this is a Fox News Poll that rates high in accuracy. Plus, it’s a Fox News Poll so Republicans can’t really dismiss it (although they will). It’s also good to remember that this is a poll out in August 2019 and anything and everything will likely happen between now and Election Day.

I spent a day with my parents driving to a birthday party. We talked about sports, family, and, of course, politics. They are in their 70s and obsessively watch… wait for it… MSNBC.

They have come to the conclusion they will vote for the person who isn’t Donald Trump. They have opinions on the field of Democrats, but ultimately they will look at the choices and will pick the person who isn’t Donald Trump.

I couldn’t agree more.

As of this moment, Joe Biden looks to be the guy who will be the choice other than Donald Trump. I’m generally okay with this. I’d rather it be Elizabeth Warren, Kamala Harris, or Pete Buttigieg, but Uncle Joe will be fine. Of course, it’s stupid early, so things could change after some voting is done in Iowa, New Hampshire, and California.

The only real question is simple, “Who has the best chance of beating Trump in 2020?” You may disagree on policy specifics, but that’s wasted time. You may think Warren will make a better President, but if Biden is the nominee, it’s wasted time not to vote for him. No one cares about policies. Not really. Not at this point. Most people just want a return to normalcy where they don’t have to worry about whatever vomit comes out of Trump’s mouth that day. Most people don’t want to worry about pissing off our allies and praising dictatorships. Most people are tired of seeing misogyny, racism, bigotry, and inequality dominate the news. They want Trump gone. Biden is leading because, quite frankly, he is a reminder of a time when the general public didn’t worry about national politics all that much.

I imagine for a great deal of the country, they already know who they are going to vote for. A dude in a MAGA hat isn’t going to be persuaded to vote for a Democrat under any circumstances. A woman worried about abortion isn’t going to suddenly feel like this Trump guy is going to fight for her rights. An 18-year-old who has friends and friends of friends who’ve been caught in mass school shootings isn’t voting for the person who can’t even be bothered with legislating background checks.

As soon as we have a Republican nominee (I mean, I guess it will be Trump) and a Democrat nominee (Biden/Warren/Harris/Sanders/Insert your fav here), the election will be decided. No debates will move anyone. I’m guessing the polls won’t change much. I can’t imagine an October surprise that will change anyone’s mind. It will simply come down to turnout. Who has the more motivated base? Who has the infrastructure to get people in swing states to the polls?

Personally, I don’t care which Democrat is on the ballot. Any Democratic nominee would make a better occupant of the White House. Any one of them would be a whole lot better than what we have now. I know it. You probably know it too. Even most Republicans know it, but they would never admit to it.

So while the horserace and campaign ups and downs will make for endless hours of entertainment, both inspiring and horrifying, the bottom line is the name on the ballot that isn’t Donald Trump is the one my parents are voting for, I’m voting for, my wife is voting for, my daughter is voting for, and my step-daughter is voting for.

I bet it’s the one you’ll vote for too.

Om Malik, writing on his blog, explains why pen and paper are good for you.

…here are my top reasons for sticking with pen and paper:

1. Paper and pen help you recall things better. They activate the “reticular activating system,” which allows us to filter out unnecessary information. This is in stark contrast to social platforms, which fill us with nonsense by the second.

2. It is faster to write on paper and pen. Many of us just can’t type fast enough. Also, it is easier to scan a piece of paper and retrieve the information.

3. Paper is highly portable. A piece of paper and a small pencil or pen don’t need much space. And it never runs out of batteries (though, there is a risk of running out of ink).

4. Paper and pen allow you to focus, as there are no notifications in a notebook. When taking notes in a notebook, you are unlikely to be distracted with the latest tweet from your friend or the President.

5. Google (or Facebook) can’t track it — yet.

Eamonn Brennan, writing in The Athletic, have a few words about this upcoming season of Illinois Basketball.

There’s a lot to like about Illinois, both in the immediate term and beyond. As for the immediate term, the 2018-19 season felt like a platform year, the throw-your-talented-kids-in-the-mix-and-let-them-figure-it-out season you often see of programs in mid-rebuild. And the kids played well. Giorgi Bezhanishvili became a star. Ayo Dosunmu was both immediately productive and full of potential. Trent Frazier had a solid sophomore season. Andres Feliz rounds out a quality core. And Illinois added some much-needed size with 6-foot-10 center Kofi Cockburn, who’ll likely play a lot right away. At worst, this team should be in the tournament mix. At best, they have serious breakout potential.

As for the long term: I remember when I heard Illinois had hired Brad Underwood. I was with to long-suffering Illinois alumnus and friend of the mailbag John Gasaway, in fact. I was surprised and impressed. John was thrilled. Underwood was really, really good at Oklahoma State, and it was a total coup for Illinois — a program that has struggled for much of the past decade — to land him. Just two years in, you can already see Underwood’s sharp, uptempo style coming through, and it’s still just the beginning.

Just the beginning.

Matt O’Neall, writing for The Champaign Room, has obviously drunk all the Orange Koolaid. In this piece that rivals The Song of Fire and Ice and The Lord of the Rings in its fantasy roots, he envisions how Illinois wins the 2020 College Football Playoff.

A couple of my favorite bits –

Lovie Smith’s sorcery solves the defense. Of course, how could we have been so blind! Lovie has been growing this beard to impart magic and wisdom onto this defense. Now that he has harnessed the power of his beard and gotten full control of the defense, he should have no issue turning this into a top-40 unit. Dumbledore, Gandalf, Lovie.

…

By this point the national media is both confused and furious. They discover Lovie has a beard and is still coaching football., but they still can’t get a half-way interesting quote out of him. The debate rages on ESPN for 10 straight hours every day whether Illinois is actually good or if the Big Ten West is actually bad.

…

The Aftermath

Mostly it’s confusion across the country.

Students riot all throughout campus and the university is forced to cancel classes for a week. Thirteen cars and two fraternities are burned in celebration.

KAM’s makes so much money during the week that they are able install functioning plumbing, and invest in mops.

Lovie shocks the world and retires and rides off into the sunset. Rod Smith takes over and looks to turn Illinois into a dynasty.

And most importantly, Illinois sports is back.

Love the optimism!

Illinois Football begins their 2019 Season August 31 against Akron.

Nicholas Bate’s secrets of success in handy PDF form.

Four pages of brilliance.

Nick Mancall-Bitel, writing in Eater, has an interesting story on the concept of “California cuisine.”

…even without a clear definition of the food on the plate, diners then and now harbor an image of California dining. The concept conjures a place more than a flavor: a table on the patio or by the pool, surrounded by desert plants and minor celebrities, a glass of wine glinting in the ceaseless sunshine. And increasingly, restaurants, both in the state and elsewhere, design their spaces to evoke this scene.

Now I’m hungry.

Luke Winkie, writing for MEL Magazine, shines a light on a highly specific subreddit on Reddit named r/TTDSWAD an acronym for That True Detective Scene with Alexandra Daddario. If you seen the first season of True Detective, there’s a pretty (in)famous full-frontal sequence with Alexandra Daddario and Woody Harrelson. That’s the whole thing.

I remember seeing it for the first time and not thinking much about it other than how it showcased Harrelson’s character as a cheating asshole. I had no idea it turned into the 21^st century equivalent of Phoebe Cates in Fast Times and Ridgemont High.

Jayson Stark, writing in The Athletic, has the most recent take on the upcoming robot apocalypse i.e. computerized ball-strike calls via TrackMan.

What James Skelton sees — what everyone in the Atlantic League sees — is that TrackMan has no feelings, doesn’t care who is on the mound, does no favors for whatever hitter is in the box, isn’t interested in how the strike zone used to be called. To get a strike call from TrackMan, there is one thing that never changes:

Some portion of the baseball has to cross over the 17-inch span from one side of the plate to the other. Period.

So there’s almost no such thing as a pitch “on the black” anymore. What has messed with many pitchers’ minds in the Atlantic League, says York manager Mark Mason, is that “it’s making them throw it over the white of the plate, not the black.”

Yes.